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Are you afraid to admit that, after all this time, you’re still not over your ex? New research ... More reveals that in all likelihood, you’re definitely not alone. Here’s why.
Ask 10 people how long they think it takes to truly get over an ex, and you’ll likely get 10 different answers. Some people say months, others say years and some might even say days. Many people also firmly believe the common saying that it takes around half the duration of the relationship itself.
However, based on March 2025 research published in Social Psychological and Personality Science, we now have a more definitive answer.
In a study including over 300 participants, researchers Jia Y. Chong and R. Chris Fraley sought to place a timeline on how long it really takes for individuals to fully relinquish their attachment to a former partner — and the final results were dumbfounding.
According to the study, participants’ attachment to their exes were only halfway dissolved after 4.18 years. In other words, on average, it can take up to eight whole years to well and truly be over an ex-lover.
As the authors explain, these results were influenced by a variety of variables. In most cases, however, the eight-year timeline was most strongly influenced by two: attachment style and continued contact with the ex.
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